Red Mist: a feeling of extreme anger that clouds one's judgement temporarily. Dictionary.com
I really lost my rag with a motorist last night. I was sorry almost as soon as I did it - not because what I said was factually wrong or it didn't correctly express how I felt, but because what I said was only ever going to inflame the situation and give the motorist the excuse I was just a yob.
It was 21.00hrs. I was cycling in secondary along the inside lane of a 30mph dual carriageway, fully lit up and wearing my hi viz reflective jacket. There was no traffic in front of me as I approached some traffic lights. A third, left turn only lane, began about 50m before the lights and this is where I was aiming to be. So travelling at 18-20mph I moved into primary within said lane as the lights changed to red. Next thing I knew a small car overtook me with less than 12-15cm room, it barely passed me when it moved into the gap between myself and the lights, forcing me into the gutter. It then stopped at the junction.
Within a couple of seconds I was level and began attempting eye contact with the driver - something she wouldn't do until I banged on the nearside window. I asked if she knew how close the overtake had been? whether she had seen me? and so on. She said she had seen me from some distance behind and stated I should have been "against the kerb" and not "in the middle of the road". I made clear I had every right to be where I was and irrespective of my position her overtake was highly dangerous. She would not concede or apologise and I just got angrier. I asked if she: was an Advanced Driver? knew the Highway Code at all? had any cycling experience? I answered my own barrage of questions by shouting she obviously did not. And then I did it. The lights were changing to green and she was getting ready to make her escape and so I ended my rant by calling her a stupid cunt with as much venom as I could muster.
Like I said I was sorry almost as soon as the words left my mouth - almost! I blame the fact she had almost seriously injured or killed me a few seconds prior. She made it quite clear she had seen me, didn't think I had the right to be in that position and so it seems had no compunction in driving as close as she could. I would certainly not apologise to the driver if I had the misfortune to meet her again. However, I have renewed my personal vow to keep my cool when dealing with some of the prats on the road. It is just very, very difficult sometimes.